Anger Issues

Oh, go to hell.

I was just minding my own business and you decide to rant on me about the blogs I visit and saying that I shouldn't read such self-opinionated articles. What the fuck, I do what I want.

I like reading snarky and impertinent articles. It's a breather from the supposed untainted world that the Korean entertainment industry tries to uphold. Reading these articles and deep analyses makes me see Kpop in a whole new level, albeit a little off-putting at times.

Sometimes, we need to see that not everybody's going to love who we love, and I, even as a hardcore SHINee fan, deems it essential that I get to know what's going on in the minds of people who do not think like I do. Even though they criticize what I think is perfection, it doesn't change my own perspective, thoughts, or opinions. Rather, I just dwell on what they think, and I also dwell on what I think and realize that it's fascinating, how each person thinks differently from the rest.

I like reading these kinds of stuff and I'll continue reading them, whether you like it or not.

I'll get over this somehow. I just need some time to cool off. 

4 more hours.

I was incredibly excited for SHINee's comeback to a certain extent that I even had a countdown with my family, although the excitement was a bit one-sided, and I was just so absolutely happy and everything was fine and brilliant and then this comes up and I just want to punch somebody hard in the gut I cannot take any more of this.

You know that feeling when you think you're on top of the world and then something hits you on the back and you fall and even though you try hard to get back up, you can't because there's that one thing holding you down and if that wasn't frustrating, you don't know what's stopping you from reaching that piece of happiness you always long for.

Yeah, that's what I feel right now.

Everything is irritating and I feel like bashing everybody I hate and love. 

And to have this happen on the eve of my boys' comeback is a little bit too much to bear.

Chasing the wind.

I hate the people.
I hate the voices.
I hate the silence.
I hate the smiles.
I hate the laughs,
I hate the happy conversations.
I hate the taunts.
I hate the screeching of the chairs.
I hate the lessons.
I hate my thoughts.
I hate my foolish unhappiness.
I hate sad songs.
I hate happy songs.
I hate my friends.
I hate my family.
I hate my feelings.
I hate my incapabilities.
I hate wanderlust.
I hate SHINee.
I hate writing.
I hate you.
I hate my life.
I hate myself.
I hate the world.
I hate everything.
But most of all, I hate hating.

Anger Issues.

*written during 1st period in the morning yesterday - English class.

This is a cruel place we live in.

Chances and opportunities are handed to others on a silver platter whilst those who want, need, and deserve it more have to strive and perspire for those wanted possibilities.

It has been my dream since I was 10 years old and to see someone experience it before I do is just so unfair and it's making me feel miserable and depressed in more ways than one and I just want to scream at everyone and everything.

Can I?

I'd like to able to do that.

Shout and scream and shriek at every little thing and every stupid person I see. Shout at this piece of paper that's filled with loathing and hidden anger and animosity. Scream at my English teacher to shut up and tell her all the things I find wrong about her. And then shriek with contempt at the world. This crazy world. This mad world. This cruel world.

Fuck this, fuck everything.