personal reminders:

1. Do not fall for a boy just because he smiles like the sun. Sometimes it will be blinding and remember that it's the same smile he gives to other girls. Also, there will come rain and stormy weather. During those times, his smile won't be as bright and as radiant.
2. Just because your father left you doesn't give you the right to be angry at the world. You're not the only one. There are others just like you, others who feel just as unloved and as insecure. But it's okay. You're going to be okay. Find light in the darkness and you'll find your way home.
3. Everything that you're doing right now, all the late nights and all the worried looks from your mother, are going to be worth it. Even if they're sucking the life out of you right now and making you feel the worst kind of drained, there is a reason for this. There must be. Or else you're fighting in a battle that cannot be won. You have to win.
4. Do not be so hard on yourself. Show the world how nice your teeth are and don't be so afraid of not being enough. It's nice not being enough, people don't know what to do with someone who already has everything. You've got gaps to fill and that's nice. Holes are nice, especially when certain people fall into them and make you a better version of yourself.
5. Listen to the compliments and believe in them even if you don't want to. Let them melt in your heart and let yourself feel warm inside. When someone tells you you're amazing, believe, even just for a split second. You will regret burying them. Let them breathe or breathe life into them. You don't deserve to feel dead.
6. Ignore the people who make you feel worthless. They're not worth your time and agony. They will never be worth your anything.
7. Write more poems, let poetry be your stronghold. Before you go to sleep, write some lines to soothe the ache in your veins and the heaviness in your heart. Let your words lull you to sleep.
8. Fandom isn't your everything. It's time to set some boundaries between right and wrong. They are your happy pills but don't depend on them for happiness. There will come a time that they will let you down and don't wait for the time that they'll break you. Save yourself while you can.
9. Work hard for your dreams. Crack your knuckles and get down on your knees and show them what you've got. Show them that you have it in you. Let them see what you've been hiding all this time.
10. Always pray and keep the faith. Yes, you have your doubts and you have your reasons for those doubts but nothing will hurt you if you ask for forgiveness and murmur a quiet thank you. You will feel loads better afterwards.
11. Stop crying. Start being stronger. Be the person your mother has always wanted you to be. 
12. Live.